Car Shopping

The other night I started the final step in the process of replacing my aging yet wonderful Pontiac. The old car has performed so well for so long. Who cares that the windows stopped working or that the a/c ran out of juice or that the transmission slips anytime you step on the gas too hard. These are all just luxuries.

Princess Lillian joined me in my car buying escapade. We went up to the local Volkswagen dealership because I've had a long running crush on the German automaker's products. We made it there shortly after 7PM about an hour from closing and were greeted by a cheery and young salesman who was eager to show us around.

Young Salesman, making an assumption that Princess and I were a couple, started making comments about "our" purchase. The comments were enhanced when he came to learn that she owns a Jetta. When he found that out he said that we could buy "his and her" Jettas. Neither Princess nor I wanted to correct him because we figured he would just get embarrassed and feel dumb. We exchanged knowing glances but let it pass.

After our tour of the lot we went inside the dealership to start talking money. Lill's job that night was to not let me buy a car, this task she performed well. She also had intended to remain virtually silent but this she did until it burst in her. Channeling her mother and mine, she began asking questions about safety features. She beat Young Salesman about the head with questions of airbags and crumple zones until he almost could not handle it. Having satisfied her born-on-the-bayou urges she relaxed into an observer role.

Young salesman began his harder sell and the comments about "our relationship" grew more obvert. I'm guessing it didn't help/hurt the situation that Princess wears a ring on her left hand that could (in the right dim light) look like a wedding band.

Incentives started to be discussed-- recent college grad, good credit, having a good hair day etc... , then Young Salesman got to owner loyalty. I've driven a GM car since the turn of the century, so I was out. But Princess is a Jetta owner and he was about to use that leverage. When he asked us if "we atleast live together" you could see her face get red and terror in her eyes of "out of wed-lock what would my grandmother think?"

I thought about playing this game out to the end and seeing how much owner loyalty would get me; but then I started to think of how I was going to prove that her and I lived together...because we clearly don't. On top that Princess hates public displays of affection and I'm sure this would top the list. Therefore, I had to explain to him that weren't married or dating. The look on Young Salesman's face was priceless. Sadly, one can only have that kind of fun so many times. I wonder how much I can get that car for now?